you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
dude, i have to cancel tonight, my neighbor just bought a goat
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
I'm drunk at McDonald's in a fairy costume at 10 am nearly two weeks after Halloween. I don't think the Ohio State fans get it.
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
Randomize
