"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
Remind me to tell you the Scottish bar story tomorrow
Remind me to tell you it was a shitty story when you're done telling it tomorrow
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
This wedding is gonna be a disaster. I already had to turn down one of the groomsmen who offered me $100 to sleep with him next wknd.
Too low?
Yes.
You okay?
I walked into work with a banana and a loaf of bread
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
All he did was like my Instagram picture and I'm already planning how to turn down sex with him this weekend...
Like will they card me for my own whiskey in shampoo bottles?
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
Also I’m on 3%. Just Incase.. I miss you and I love you and you’re my everything and I’m getting drunk.
Randomize
