That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
She's like a pop up book from hell.
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
My goal in life is to ruin sex for someone. To be so mindblowingly unreal that they can never find anyone like me ever again. So far it's going well.
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
Randomize