It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
I walked in on you eating olive oil off of a plate. you gave me this look and I just started crying. we were that drunk.
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
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