we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
The sex toys I ordered are being shipped to my billing address instead of shipping address. Take a guess where they're on their way to right now - my parents' house. And the package has to be signed for so there's no way around it. Fuck.
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
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I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
Fun fact: female penguins have sex in exchange for pebbles to build nests. I now know what im being for halloween
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
I don't know... But I do think this is probably the longest series of texts we've written discussing your cock. David was right, it is a brave new world. Also, slow day at work again?
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Hey it happens. Think of it this way- you didn't wake up in jail, your face wasn't inexplicably busted and you still have all your teeth. In this group of friends, you're on top!
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone