so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
Just spun two beer bottles and Placed them in my pockets perfect... I feel like the clint eastwood of drunks
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
You know, I think I'm going to rock the shit out of this whole mid-twenties thing. Fuck babies and weddings -- I have vodka and young cock.
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
We were having margaritas and I was saying "back when I was drinking..." They looked all confused. Then I realized "holy shit they think THIS is drinking?"
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
I'm sorry I crashed your motorcycle and watched you get robbed from a rooftop. Will you please come back or at least drop off my shoes?
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
I didn't really break out of the friend zone, as much as I blasted the doors off with high explosives and rode through on a grizzly bear...
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