But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
i want two things in life...emily to stop talking and a block of cheese.
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
My most recent midlife crisis involved eating a doughnut in 30 seconds but taking 5 minutes to do half a shot of whiskey, then deciding I wasn't going to finish it.
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
Let the clothes fall where they may.
Randomize
