she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
We all make mistakes. Just lock them up deep down inside your mind so they can surface as weird sexual fantasies it takes your therapist years to decipher when your 40
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
Randomize