Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
i ran into my coworkers when i was walking home last night. i was shirtless. i think i gave my shirt to Walter. he's a cat.
im still drunk. birthday week begins.
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
Randomize
