found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
Is it sad that the only reason I haven't lapsed into depression is that I'm prettier than her?
Nah, we all need something.
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
Is it inappropriate to send a happy 3-year anniversary of having a threesome with you and your ex girlfriend on easter text?
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
Randomize
