Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
I just set an alarm for 5 am tomorrow morning titled "Wake and Bake Its Christmas motherfucker"
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
