Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
i just jacked off to lindsey vonn, i feel so patriotic
USA! USA! USA!
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
I woke up next to her will a oven mit taped to my cock. Dear god, I might have tried to use it as a condom.
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
Randomize
