Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
Woke up chewing my pillow from a dream where I was scarfing Cajun pasta from TGI Friday's. That's a new level of fat, even for us
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
This is a life or shit situation. Grab me toilet paper asap. This bathroom is fucking out. This is not a test. This an actual emergency and I am not joking.
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
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