I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
Then you shook your fists at the sky and explained to us that losing a sneeze is like losing an orgasm
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
Randomize
