arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
Tiger Woods should have just walked in, gave everyone a high five, and left.
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
Success! We fucked roommates!
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Randomize
