I was the only open register tonight and I just sold condoms and chocolate frosting to the ex..
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
WHY DID HE INTRODUCE ME TO HIS MOM? CAN'T HE JUST HIDE ME LIKE EVERYONE ELSE I'VE EVER DATED?@!
I found a loose wire in my thermostat. Couldn't find the pliers, so I used a nipple clamp to fix it.
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
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