I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
If we had kids we couldn't come home, get high and watch porn together. And that's like the only reason I get up in the morning
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
My sister texted me to say she just found a corn on the cob in her purse from last night. You need to party with us more.
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
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