what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
he said i give him, and i quote, "emotional blue balls"
What is a reasonable amount of condoms to keep in my condom wallet without it being creepy that I have too many?
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
Randomize
