is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
even in the morning, she still thinks my british accent is real.
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
I just jerked off in front of my dog to make him jealous of my thumbs. There are consequences for stealing the last cheeto!
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
If I didn't have booty calls, my apartment would never get clean
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