I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
Is it weird that I Facebook creep hot people from their credit card receipts?
Being single for so long makes me fucking creepy.
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
so it turns out the huge bruises on my knees are from drunk bmxing and not getting railed from behind on the ground
and ill have you know that I only wiped out twice
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
Many a woman has been in tears over the passing of my penis' whorish ways.
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
Randomize
