So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
Dude. Where are you? There's a hot chick drunkenly dancing on the bar and aggressively taking shots to Pink songs. She looks like she needs a rebound. Get. Here. Now.
FUCK NYC TRAFFIC.
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
and eventually we just all took our pants off
Omg. I checked my purse this morning and I'm pretty sure drunk me stole a frat guys tube of crest 3d white toothpaste. Like that's pretty fucked up but I think if I knew someone did that to me I'd probably still invite them over again cuz I'd be like, "this girl's creative, and has good hygiene."
Randomize
