garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
I threw up under water while wearing a hockey helmet last night. Awesome.
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
I just made kick ass drunk stir fry while taking care of three other drunk people and doing shots. I don't understand how that's not wife material
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
I'm getting drunk by myself again. But I'm not shotgunning any of them. That's self-restraint, right?
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
It's 6am and I had to explain to the gas station attendant why I didn't have shoes on and I'm covered in maple syrup.
Randomize
