You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
For some reason 'start yourself on fire drunk' isn't nearly as funny after last 4th of july..
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
you were mass sexting so we took your phone away
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
I don't like kids.
You were literally holding a baby 5 minutes ago
I like them before they learn to speak and after they learn to think.
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