OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
This is a test of Andrews drunk texting, had this been an actual drunk text, all the words would be spelled incorrectly and would be missing key verbs and nouns, followed by a request to not get fired.
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
Please tell me you werent the one who replaced every beer bottle in my fridge with a picture of a baby kitten.
... and if i was..
Fuck. You.
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
I knocked over his glass and he yelled "Oh no the boxed wine!" and slurped it off the coffee table. Then he showed me how to mix maple syrup, Jameson, and coffee. My family is better than your family.
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