K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
I'm going to community service drunk, and I'm still going to be the most normal person there.
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
He literally said from now on he's always banging chicks with asthma becuas it's such an ego booster
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
Randomize
