No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
I HAD TO TAKE A SHOT OF JAGER AND SOME REDBULL JUST TO SEE IF IT’LL MAKE MY MOUTH FEEL BETTER
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
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