Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
DON'T BE A PUSSY. ONLY 1/3 OF THE WORDS IN YOUR LAST TEXT WERE MISSPELLED, WHICH MEANS YOU NEED 2/3 MORE SHOTS.
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
Because if not I was going to quote Ryan Lochte as punishment
Thank god I got my shit together
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
You snapped me at 3am drunk laying on your floor asking if I knew how we couldn't have predicted the housing crisis.
I need a fucking roommate.
You need a fucking babysitter.
There are flour footprints all over the house. Either u guys are trying to pull that Paranormal Activity shit on me again, or u got drunk and tried to make pancakes.
Randomize
