what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
You ran away and I found you three blocks later lying by a dumpster because "that's where your life belongs"
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
and I'm going to name my autobiography "blow jobs with enthusiasm are the best"
I'm naming my autobiography "Reasons Not to Date Girls From Texas."
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
Legitimately sent a work email with "Hey, you kids, get off my lawn" as the subject line.
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
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