Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
I just woke up to my FedEx of contacts I've been waiting for for about a week and my hungover ass went to the bathroom and used beer instead of contact solution.
He's coming over tonight...I really wish I didn't have my period right now...
I believe I'm witnessing the first time ever that you wished your period would NOT come....
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
I have one of those hangovers where you visualize how awesome it would be to climb in your fridge and drink glacier water
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
pray to the hookup gods
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
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