Just had to open a tuna can with a spoon. Gave me a sense of hunting for my own food.
Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
You were running around the house covered in syrup, with shredded down pillow feathers on your body screaming "AFLACK!" at everyone
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
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