Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
Tell mom and/or dad that I am going to be home late. I am really blazed. Don't tell them that part, though.
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
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He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
Walked into the bar with my burrito and ordered a round of shots for everyone. Not sure if I want to look at the credit card statement.
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
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My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
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