So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
we were in your room and your mom was singing twinkle twinkle little star in the hallway. so you decided to scream "twinkle? TWINKLE! What Fucking little star?!"
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
It gives me purpose in life to help fulfill nerdy fantasies. Like I'm doing something good for mankind and having multiple orgasms in the process.
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
I came in like 30 seconds, and my dog got to watch me take the walk of shame to the bathroom to clean up. All in all, not my best performance.
I think it's a bit on the nose for the Uber driver to play stairway to heaven while driving like A psycho.
Randomize
