If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
Ugh why can't people just be grateful for my penis
This is not a drill. I need a cape. And a tuxedo. Simultaneously. Repeat. NOT. A. DRILL....
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
WAIT YOU’VE NEVER BEEN TO COSTCO???
COSTCO IS MAGICAL
I can’t believe you two made a group text to scream at me about Costco.
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