I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Randomize
