Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
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