Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
How does one fall all the way up a flight of stairs? Its hard on me knowing that the survival of our species depends on me not reproducing.
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
He ain't mine yet. Gotta have a third date before I pee on him and mark territory.
Oh. Wait. That happened on the second date.
He shit in the fireplace
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