She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
It's never too late to be topless.
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
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