Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
Nothing says "You're all grown up now" like setting up your 401k with shitty underwear.
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
I literally stabbed myself so I had a valid reason to get out of having sex with her
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
Randomize