im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
Dude this girl just said she'd take me to pleasure town while giving me head
Will Ferrell is probably jerking himself off somewhere wishing he was you
you told all the 17 year old girls at the party that your mating call was "I glitter in the sun"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
I wish a box of wine came w a hose. It'd be so much easier to drink from.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
Stop chatting and get in the fucking car. I didn't get my asexual ass out of bed just to watch you flirt and fail with someone you're never going to see again.
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.
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