I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
hey call me
can't. in the shower.
... and this is probably why your phone does not work half the time.
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
My right boob is officially about a handful while my left is 1 and 3/4 handfuls. I'm staring at the mirror falling into a deep depression.
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
I named my Roomba after my pot dealer. I have a problem, don't i?
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
Randomize
