At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
Missing both credit cards and just had a flashback of grinding my nuts on the terrified cab driver for amusement. i am feeling a slight hate for myself right now.
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
I have one of those hangovers where you visualize how awesome it would be to climb in your fridge and drink glacier water
So I come back home and a huge flock of enormous vultures are on my roof
They're waiting for you to die
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
I will expect an hourly check text to confirm you are alive and that you aren't dead in a ditch somewhere with a hobo dry humping your corpse
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
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