i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
Someone sent me a drink from across the bar. It was water.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
I sang him a lovely rendition of 'So Long and Thanks For All the Fish", but replaced fish with dick.
I met a gypsy today. She told me my soul animal was an owl and says she will now remember me as "Owl Girl".
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
Sorry about my sloppy drunk texts. I'm not sure talking about banging a near dead Jimmy Stewart was my finest moment
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
ok first of all what the fuck
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
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