you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
So the same day I accidentally bought waterproof mascara is the day I accidentally had shower sex. The world is finally on my side.
omg i met someone at the bar who sells hair feathers. that are long. saved in my phone as "haiirs deather"
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
Like I owe him sex. Hell fucking no. I owe myself sex. With a celebrity. Or a clean pornstar. Who knows.
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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