They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
He felt like a one man threesome
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
I can't tell if I'm still on the hangover from last night, or if I'm experiencing the one from tomorrow, because it was so powerful that it actually traveled back through time...
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
I can hear the pillow talk now, "how many condoms did you bring? Good, put them all on,"
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
Randomize
