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• (304): View more from West Virginia

  all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over

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• (317): View more from Indiana

  Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think

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• (807): View more from Ontario

  I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.

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• (908): View more from New Jersey

  I woke up with his wallet, but not him. Gold-digging at it's finest.

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  23 Strangest Things That Gave Dudes A Boner

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• (757): View more from Virginia

  just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life

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• (319): View more from Iowa

  As payment for all the times you have babysat me while im drunk, im giving you the shorts i stole from the guy i stayed with on friday night. They're clean. Come get em.

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• (248): View more from Michigan

  They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.

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• (702): View more from Nevada

  I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...

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• (910): View more from North Carolina

  Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.

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• 

  These 21 People Shouldn’t Be Giving Dating Advice

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• (928): View more from Arizona

  It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".

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• (562): View more from California

  Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.

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• (301): View more from Maryland

  What procrastination leads to: I have submitted a third of my job applications this week with a BAC that would get me arrested

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• (712): View more from Iowa

  it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina

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• (360): View more from Washington

  My liver is preforming stress tests.

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• (716): View more from New York

  You kicked my dad IN THE NUTS right when he walked in.

  (315): View more from New York

  Sorry, man. Thought he was a cop.

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