Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
you left a giant bottle of vodka in my room from last night. does this serve as a parting gift or hush money?
Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
19 Of The Creepiest (Most Inexplicable) Things People Experienced
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
I had one beer! ONE BEER! They took shots in mourning of my tolerance last night. My ability to drink is a joke.
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.