i just traded a sweatshirt for margaritas... why did they ever stop using the barter system??!!
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
so I definitely just chased tequila shots with a biscuit covered in sausage gravy
Thats fucking manlier than riding a bear into battle
I said "sucks to suck" to a cop last night. We've been snapchatting.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you're funny as hell and have a mustache, odds are I'm probably gonna fuck you
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
Fuckin' raining men in my bedroom while I'm trying to drunk eat a rather large portion of pasta. Like shoo I already picked who I'm sleeping with. Pasta wins.
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Randomize