The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just fingered the ice cream at home instead of getting a spoon
been there done that
k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
You added his wife on Facebook?! You're horrible at this mistress thing
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