Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
Also I've decided that I'm buying the next friend of mine who is dumb enough to get married a live porcupine as a wedding present.
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
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