yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
I'm like a magical alcohol dispenser. I pulled this kahlua out of my vagina.
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
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