thus making me awesome and them whores
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
The last thing I remember is trying to split my bridesmaid dress down the back like the incredible hulk.
and you succeeded.
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
I woke up to a gigantic ft-long tootsie roll and a note by drunk me with the words "you're welcome"
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize
