my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
Your roommates will be treating you to many anecdotes about my intentions to have aggressive sex with you. I'm sorry in advance.
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
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